Fake Littles Red Flags and Warning Signs

Fake Littles Red Flags and Warning Signs

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  • They claim you are their Caregiver instantly or without talking with you about that type of decision. (Example, "I saw you were a single Daddy looking for a little. I'm going to start calling you my Daddy.)

  • They call you, "Daddy," "Mommy," or another Caregiver term right away before entering in a relationship or scene with you. (Example, you just started to chat with this person for the very first time and haven't come to a mutual arrangement in being their actual Caregiver but they say, "Daddy, I want you to...")

  • They do not accept when you say, "No," or tell them about your personal boundaries. (Example, "Oh, Mommy, you're just being silly. Of course you want to...")

  • They only really seem to want to talk about themselves and have no interest in you or your interests, desires, dreams, goals, or future. (Primarily, they seek your attention through forms of constantly manipulating conversation to center around them.)

  • They only want to talk to you when they choose--often when they are feeling depressed or lonely or when they want a gift--instead of trying to make time to spend with you. (Example, they only chat with you when they found a few toy that they really want but they can't personally afford for themselves. Another example, they can only make time to chat with you after you have given them money or a gift.)

  • They base you being a good or bad Caregiver on how many items you are purchasing from them, your financial income, or if you can/will financially support them. (Example, "You're not a very good Daddy since you don't have a good job and can't take care of me. I'm a little and I'm not suppose to work. A good Daddy knows they will have to support a little entirely!")

  • They never followed agreed upon punishment, and when confronted about their lack of agreed obedience they either claim you to be a bad Caregiver or redirect the conversation to how depressed they are with themselves. (Example, "I know I didn't do the punishment like you said, and I know it isn't against my boundaries or anything, but I am just so depressed again with all of this because I can never do anything right!")

  • Their interest in you was originally sparked when you revealed you were recently broken up with by another person. This is a red flag that they are looking for vulnerable people. They are looking to manipulate someone. They make it sound like they are everything you've always wanted and needed, and are quick to use phrases such as, "I would never do that to you."

  • When you initially meet them they talk about how incredibly depressed they are due to a recent break-up or traumatic-sounding event (like the death of someone close to them). Be aware that they are setting the stage to sound like a vulnerable person. The important part to watch out for is that just as strongly as they were depressed they are just as quickly to fall "in love" with you and make it sound like you're a savior or angel to them. This is a huge sign that they are looking to manipulate someone through sympathy and will continue to lure you in to being vulnerable. Be on guard for manipulation through false suicide threats.


  • They never seem to appreciate you or the efforts you put forth to care for them. (Example, you made a 3 hour trip to visit them on their birthday as a surprise gift and, instead of being happy about your visit, they only complained and pointed out everything that didn't go exactly how they dreamed.)

  • They don't treat you as a traditional partner in any sense, but, rather, as a distant parental figure. (Example, they won't ever hug or kiss you because they wouldn't do that to their own biological parent.)
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