Littlespace Online

I'm sorry if you read this. I just don't know where else to let this out. I'm crumbling. I don't know where to go what to say. I feel lost and like everything I say to everyone is wrong. I've always known I was like broken porcelain doll then anything else. I've always regressed, for a while after finding out that it was ok, I embraced it completely, and learned to love that part of me.
I started dating, taking big risks with my life (I flew from Vegas, to NY for the chance of happiness). I take risks with my safety over and over again. I let it get to me everytime I trusted someone completely, who claimed to be a good daddy/mommy/friend. Almost every time I was left to pick up the pieces. Why am I doing this to myself? I'm letting my health slip, I hardly sleep, and am letting myself fall back into binge eating, I snap at everyone cry at the drop of a hat.
All because all I do anymore is talk or search for people to accept me. I just don't know I think maybe this is part of me that should stay hidden from the world at least for now. I think maybe I need to stop searching for someone that may never find me. I think I need to learn to be someone who needs no one. And doesn't fall apart so easy.