I don't know if going into your headspace during a painful time could be part of the problem, but that sounds like it was very sad, I'm sorry
Everyone is different, I guess. For me, little space isn't that distant. I'm kind of always little, even as an adult...I don't know why but I'm having a hard time explaining that. Anyways, When I'm stressed and really can't get into little space,I do adult and little things to relax me. Meditation, and maybe some wine or apple juice in a sippy cup. Bubble baths are great, and usually I'll color in a children's coloring book, or watch cartoons that I used to watch when I was REALLY little. Usually by then I'll be in little space completely, but sometimes not. Just try to do things that really relax you, as an adult and as little, and hopefully it'll happen naturally. Good luck!
TTFN