[_hellosadieee]

Lately it seems like the daddies I've come across have been only after sex or not true daddies. Most have only claimed to be a Daddy to see what a bigger girl is like. How do you know you have a true Daddy? Someone who is going to care for you and make you feel special. Not just use you.

[JuneStar]

You probably aren't going to like my answer but it's honestly the truth.
It takes time and effort while NOT specifically seeking someone special. I'm going to explain:

If you want a real, true Daddy that you are happily compatible with and who will stick with you in the long run then you don't start off looking for it to be more than friendly conversation.

You start off as friends. You don't jump straight to thinking about a potential relationship. You don't start off as friends-with-benefits or sexy/twisty talk. You don't start off with the kink being the sole reason you're chatting. You start off with getting to know the person first to get a feel of who they really are every day versus in a scene, part of a relationship dynamic, or strictly kink-oriented.

I mean, it's going to be really silly to enter in a relationship with someone have absolutely nothing in common aside from the Caregiver/little dynamic. They could be interested in spending their weekends in a club while you're interested in sitting at home, relaxing. They could be a work-a-holic while that lifestyle bothers you. They could be a big movie buff while you would rather enjoy the books and skip the movies. They could have goals to move to Texas in 2 years and begin starting a large family of 8 while you want to live in New York and have only 1-2 children, if any, later in life. They may want a partner who works a full-time job while your dream is to be a stay-at-home homemaker. You could really be into wine tasting while they've been battling alcoholism for the past 3 years. Maybe you're a vegetarian for ethical reasons and he thinks people who do that are ridiculous and overly concerned.
Small personality mis-matches can be much bigger when they start piling on top of each other.

These things you have no idea about if you're saying, "Oh, you're a single Daddy Dom? I'm a single little. We're obviously compatible then! Let's get started and I'll put my heart into this, trusting we're the perfect match..!"

(I mean, come on, that's so backward. It's like saying boy+girl=match. We're better than, "Oh, you're a single boy? I'm a single girl. Obviously we're meant to be together!")

Having ONE thing in common doesn't mean you're compatible or that it's right to pursue anything further. You need to become friends. Better friends. Closer friends. Close friends. Best friends. THEN think about taking it out of the friendship zone.

Friends first. ONLY FRIENDS.

It's what works best most of the time. You're not in a vulnerable position where a potential-user/abuse is saying, "Oh, maybe he/she is desperate enough to let me see if I can use this to my advantage for a quick fix."
You're also not in a situation where you've become romantically involved but know little-to-nothing about your partner's everyday interests, likes, dislikes, goals, desires, etc. aside from them wanting to take on a Daddy role (and, let's be honest, that isn't the ONLY part of who they are!).

I highly recommend being more active in the community and NOT searching for a partner.

Let things spark when they spark.

Write more on the forum so people recognize you as knowledgeable and interesting--so they want to reach out to you and begin a FRIENDSHIP. (Post an introduction of yourself. Answer questions around the site when you can. Ask questions. Participate in the fun threads and activities. Make yourself known in the community!)

Enter the chat room and converse with people. Be friendly. Be personable. Be you. Don't be LOOKING for a spark. If it's going to happen, it will happen, so there's no sense in trying to push for it.

That's, honestly, the best advice I have for finding a partner.

I know you may be lonely, and I know you may crave a Caregiver more than anything in the world--but the way you're going about it sounds like you're setting yourself up for failure after failure, heartbreak after heartbreak, and disappointment after disappointment.

Set yourself up for friends, happiness, and future relationships. A Caregiver will come that is highly compatible with you, cares about you and ALL of your interests, and shares more than just the Caregiver/little dynamic interest with you.