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Postby BriBri360 » 1 year ago

This is a topic I have searched for but couldn't find anything on. I wanted to put this here because this is something that has probably happened to both littles AND caregivers.

Twice I have been catfished, a term meaning led on by someone of the same gender posing as a member of the opposite relations or just in general someone they are not, in the realm of a man pretending to be a lg or ab girl, and I have some severe trust issues. I've been working with a therapist to get over these.

I am still willing to look to be a Daddy to a willing baby girl, or be a baby boy for a loving Mommy, but I'm really going to need some time getting to know someone first.

Does anyone else feel this way?

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Re: Catfished

Postby JuneStar » 1 year ago

I've not been catfished as far as I am aware. I've talked to a lot of people online throughout the years and I'm sure a few of them have lied about who they are or their intentions but I guess I've never gotten incredibly close to someone only to learn that they've lied about some major personal aspects.

I know I've heard a lot of littles talk about how they've been hurt by fake Daddy Doms online. In a way, it's sort of the same since it's messes with a person's emotions and sense of reality. I always feel so bad when I hear about how heartbroken somebody is when someone just up and vanishes on them.

I have been hurt in relationships before and have a lot of heavy baggage that comes with me.

I know what it's like to need to truly get to know someone before giving them trust with your emotions. It's good to keep trying to look at a positive side and know that not everyone is trying to deceive you.

There are more things that have been in more common use these days. Skype has the ability to video chat through webcamming and webcams are either pre-installed on computers or relatively cheap. Most people have cellphones now and can talk or text often enough to give an idea of their true personality, demeanor, and voice. Exchanging care packages or gifts are also things that can be done that will tell a lot about a person, what they like, how giving they are, how appreciative they are, and (oftentimes) who they live with in their household.

Flights are cheaper, travel is a little easier since we can bring along lifelines like cell phones, and people are more comfortable with the thought of meeting someone "from the internet" so it isn't as strange as it once was to hear about or do.

It's good to take things slow--very good, actually--but you should use the tools I've mentioned above to your advantage. When you're still in th friend phase start incorporating Skype calls with video chat just to hang out--even if all you two are doing are derping around on games or on various sites. You don't have to wait to get to an intimate stage to develop a good friendship through the internet!

I'm super sorry you've been hurt in the past but I'm sure you have a bright future with a lovely partner waiting just a little ahead.


Re: Catfished

Postby BriBri360 » 1 year ago

Thanks for the thoughtful reply Star. it helps a lot.

The other thing about being catfished is that because of how traumatizing the overall experience is, you end up feeling like you are the only person it has ever happened to, even though in reality, it is most certainly not the case.

I'm taking my time in finding someone and def. not rushing things. I'm learning more to appreciate being alone and sometimes just how much it is needed. Especially given my own personal issues.

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