Being a little not into BDSM

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SweetYoungPrince
Posts: 14
Joined: 7 months ago
Role: Little boy

Re: Being a little not into BDSM

Postby SweetYoungPrince » 6 months ago

Thank you everyone for your insight, I understand there's a lot of different viewpoints on this topic and it's hard to sort out. I understand the concept of wanting to occupy littlespace, or just ageplay can exist independently of BDSM and any sort of powerplay, I just wasn't sure if this was the right sort of community to be seeking a relationship that isn't built around powerplay.

I'm not really much into the whole aspect of rules and following directions as I am exploring a nurturing dynamic, where the exchange is more of an adoring child with an encouraging guardian.

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pastelpunkprettyboy
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Role: Little boy

Re: Being a little not into BDSM

Postby pastelpunkprettyboy » 6 months ago

KillerCutie wrote:No, see, everything I've said is that there does not have to be someone who is in charge and someone who is not.
At least, not in a bdsm sense. Because there are "power dynamics" in literally every relationship you have with anyone you meet ever. Does that make it all bdsm? Nope. Being a dom or a sub to someone is a concious thing, a decision you have to make and consent to, and all that jazz.


There.... There really isn't power dynamics in every relationship you have. Friends? Nope. If your vanilla relationship has a power dynamic, that's just not right. The only relationships where there should be an established power dynamic is with a teacher, your boss/employer, or your parents/family older than you. Any other relationship outside of that is just... Nope. You're all on equal footing in any other relationship.

Look, the thread asked for an opinion, I gave mine, I have also given reasoning behind mine as well as rebuttal reasoning when asked. I'm not going to try to convince anyone of it. My reasoning is mine. You clearly disagree. That's fine. I don't really care one way or another. My view is mine, and based around seeing minors utilize various excuses to justify their participation in an 18+ environment.

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Rosetta
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Re: Being a little not into BDSM

Postby Rosetta » 6 months ago

I also agree with Pastel, there's really no way around it being BDSM. And i think their outlook on the matter is the open-minded one, as they have no issues considering the idea that it is BDSM, and accepting this idea, rather than doing everything possible in order to deny such possibilities ;)

There are maybe other power dynamics in life, such as boss/employee, but when it comes to relationships, and a clear power dynamic where one gets more power than the other, it IS belonging to BDSM. If both partners have equal power, it's called Vanilla.
So, indeed, if you have a childish person, and a less childish person, and they are together but both people have equal power, it is indeed not BDSM. But if you have a Little and a CG, where one person needs to listen to the other person and there are agreements that this power is unequal in this dynamic, we have a power exchange dynamic which, belongs to BDSM.
And you can be a Little, and crave this power exchange dynamic. That means you're twisty. Because if you would not crave any sort of power exchange, but just a simple, equal power relationship, that would be considered Vanila.
And of course, it is very possible that many people LIVE an actual power exchange in their relationship. And it is also possible that many single Littles don't experience a true power exchange because they are single (but they still crave it, and their inside Big will take the role at some point anyway). Does that make them less twisty? Nope. But just not everyone is open to the idea of being twisty, and lots of people would never dare to admit to themselves they are.

But that is fine also. I have been together with someone that was my Master, my Dom and my Daddy within the last year, to end with him saying he doesn't fit to any such labels while searching his place in all of this. Did that make him less Dominant? Nope. And I was just being patient until the moment he would realize this. And when he did, something beautiful happened, because accepting oneself can do that.
And I think that's the important part. You don't have to accept it, you don't even have to believe it. It's your choice, to decide how far your acceptance can and wants to go. I will also NEVER enjoy scatplay or blood, and I have huge issues accepting also that anyone could ever actually find that pleasurable haha ;)


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