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How to end a DDLG relationship? (without breaking up)

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How to end a DDLG relationship? (without breaking up)

Postby Flowers-in-Bloom » October 23rd, 2015, 10:32 am

I've been in a DD/lg relationship for about 2 years now. We didn't start off as DDlg but I want it to end. I don't want to break up though.

I just want to go back to normal boyfriend/girlfriend. I don't want it to constantly be this weird struggle for dominance or submission. I just want to relax and hang out--do what we want to do without thinking about who should do what and why and when and how. I don't want him to get upset because I didn't do "chores" or something. I just want us to be normal again. I feel like it's gone way too far and we're so deep into this dynamic that I'm miserable.

I really love him. I do. And I think he loves me too. I just think we got too much into BDSM. I think it was fun at first and sometimes it's great but sometimes it's too much. I just want to love him holding me while we watch a movie without being babied constantly or call him Daddy because...I'm just tired of it. do I end the Daddy dom/little girl dynamic in the relationship without us actually breaking up?

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Re: How to end a DDLG relationship? (without breaking up)

Postby JuneStar » November 19th, 2015, 10:04 am

Talk to him and tell him how you're feeling. Start off gently and try to explain yourself in the best words possible. Write down points you want to address to help guide you through the conversation.

I think for a lot of littles that are younger, they will find they outgrow their littleness and settle into adulthood. A lot of folks who are 18-19-20 are in a strange part of life where they are an adult but, many times, don't yet have full adult responsibilities or expectations on them. I wonder how many littles today will look back in a couple of years and want to forget they ever dove into this dynamic for awhile.

Don't be ashamed of having felt your way through and need to back out of the dynamic a bit. If you think 24/7 isn't for you then it isn't. If you're not happy then you're not happy. Let him know. Make a plan to present to him. Talk about what you both want and need out of the relationship. Work through it together and make adjustments as needed.

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Re: How to end a DDLG relationship? (without breaking up)

Postby growinguplittle » November 19th, 2015, 12:43 pm

If you still like parts of the dynamic, you can always step back a little bit to a place that feels better and more comfortable to you (and him)! Like Star said, communication is key. Maybe you could write down a list before talking to your S.O. You could have a column for what you like and might want to keep, and a list of things that you no longer enjoy.. Be specific! If you only want to keep the dynamic in the bedroom, for example, that's perfectly okay and lots of people have that understanding. Some people have an agreement where there is a "trigger" that means that they're in a Daddy or little mood - maybe a word you use (like a certain pet name) or a certain distinct activity/behavior. That could help maintain your "sometimes it's great" feeling, without the constant 24/7 struggle. But then again, if you really do want to remove yourself completely from a Dd/lg dynamic, you should do your best to convey that and your reasons why to you S.O. Since you were together before Dd/lg, and people who are Daddies tend to be naturally understanding, I really hope it goes well for you and your boyfriend!

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