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New, inexperienced, and recently discovered adult babies, regressors, littles, and Caregivers ask for perspectives, advice, tips, and information from more knowledgeable friends.
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By Avy
#55912
Hello Everyone

My name is Avy. My question is similar to the "Am I too old" but a bit different.

I'm scared but I'll put this out there and be honest. I just turned 57, but I think that most of my life since probably 7 or 8 I have always wanted to be treated like I was younger. Or at least my age.

I was very tall early on and 'mature' for my age so no one ever babied me. My parents weren't affectionate and I an a very huggy kissy (non physically intimate. I just found out I am asexual but that's another story!) When I took ballet was too tall to lift so I didn't get the 'female' parts. My favorite color is pink and I have always loved cute things. I still do.

I remember when I was young and scared at night I would either stay up and read kids books ( I was around 11 ) Or I would pick my brother up and carry him in my bed to sleep with me!
In high school I wanted all cute things and cute clothes (I hated that my feet were and still are too big for girly pink and cute decorated things shoes. that still hurts my heart)

I have always had a bed full of stuffies and still do. I just had surgery and I realize now I must have looked weird with the stuffie I had with me the whole time.

I'll try to make this shorter. I have always been the one in relationships to take care of all of the business especially financial. I want someone to take charge of that for me now or at least help. I still long for someone to hug me and say it's going to be okay and take care of me, and baby me. I don't have family anymore and I have lived alone single since 2012. Me and my few friends were workaholics before all this now so being home alone now is not fun.

This has come to a head (side note I was at the store and saw a man who was way taller that me and looked like he could pick me up and hug me and I wanted to ask so bad :( ) in the last year I have had less than 10 hugs and I can't take it.

I think I have been fighting being a little most of my life and now. I know I would be between 5 - 10, I love doing things that age range. I guess this is my coming out officially hi hi! so I guess I would just like to be here and talk to other's.

Thank you for letting me ramble even since I am scared I will be lurking and probably be embarrassed about this post. :>.<: I have just been crying and need to see what other people are doing. :sry:

Avy
#55954
Welcome to the community! :p7:

Self discovery can be intense at times but it sounds like in your heart you know who you really are and how to identify yourself. Trust yourself and give yourself patience to continue exploring what life has to offer you. You know who you are better than anyone else.

Do always remember that you don’t need to rush yourself into anything. You also don’t need to convince others of your identity. Just be yourself and enjoy your life!

You can find some helpful resources from our community here that may help during your discovery:
https://www.littlespaceonline.com/viewforum.php?f=88

If there ever comes a time where you want to seek out a partner you should register at the community partnering/dating site:
https://www.datecgl.com/

Since you mentioned having some longing for more interaction since this past year has meant social isolation at times, please do consider speaking to a therapist to make sure you stay in a healthy mental state for yourself. Your happiness is important, and you are worth taking that step for if you haven’t already. Social isolation is so hard for everyone so it’s expected that you might just need someone to talk with to make sure you’re treating yourself fairly.

Enjoy your path :hugs:
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