Littlespace Online

I seem to be running into a recurring theme based on the conversations I’ve had with assorted women who identify as submissive/little. The plot seems to go like this… Submissive/little gets contacted online by a Daddy Dom. DD instantly tries to get her to be submissive/little to him by calling her pet names or telling her what he would do to her or ordering her around. Submissive/little female is (usually) not amused and instantly blocks the Daddy from sending any more messages.

Doing this (as a Daddy) makes no sense for the most part. Many men, unfortunately completely miss that, yes she might be a sub/little but she’s not YOUR sub/little the moment you meet. At least not yet. She’s not submissive/little to every person she meets. She doesn't owe a stranger any devotion, love, naked pictures, sex, etc... More than likely she’s going to be submissive ONLY to a person with whom she can build trust and respect with first.

Most men seem to completely miss the fact that you must first seduce/capture a woman’s mind, before you can seduce/capture her body. The huge part of DDlg is the psychological aspect of the whole thing. It's really all about creating a different reality to enjoy. The mind is an original zone, gentlemen. Think about how you can stimulate that part first. Be kind, caring, nurturing, loving and supportive. If you can turn on a woman’s mind, her body will surely follow. Now, I don’t mean this in a manipulative way in any way at all, just stating some psychological facts that tend to apply to most of the human race. People want to feel a certain way about you before they lust for you.

Being confident is one thing, but coming across as an abusive meanie buttons is another. Sure, some littles will love it, but most will just run the other way. Learn the way of the mind and you will open doors you didn’t even know existed.

Oh my gosh thank you! I run into this problem even WITHOUT some guys knowing I'm a little so it's nice to know that some people understand!

Thanks! I got quite a bit of mocking for posting this on another DDlg site.. No idea why, but it made me laugh.

Yup! I can tell from personal experience that I've had men act like that and I've run away.

This is so important. A little's submission is to be earned and not expected. I'm not sure if these issues are more frequent now because more new DDs come into the community without understanding the underlying BeDeeSeM dynamics, but it's extremely off-putting to many littles. (Especially the new ones that come to expect this kind of behaviour.)

But the same can be said for littles who jump ship and immediately call a dom, "daddy". They're a DD, but they're not your DD.

Just want to say thank you for posting this though! It's great to see doms with this kind of mindset.