Caregivers, Mommies, Daddies, adult babies, middles, babyfur, diaperfur, and all other Bigs and littles discuss regression, relationship dynamics, have open group conversation, share experienced advice, and exchange ideas to help one another grow in knowledge. (Age 18 or older only permitted)
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By Puddin98
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#53176
Hi, Sorry if I’m repetitive to someone’s earlier post. I’m new to this site and to being little. But I wanted to know what are ways people find helpful to be little while in their own and in stressful situations.

A big part of why I’m engaging with little space is because that’s kinda the mindset I go into when I’m in an anxiety attack. Also, I wanna be able to get a good childhood, the one I didn’t get. But I still am living at home while I’m at Uni and it’s… stressful.

I don’t have a caregiver and I feel like when I’m able to be little I can’t let myself be fully little. A small part of me wants to remain alert in case something’s happening at home.

So far I’ve tried to make routines to help give myself structure for little space. I do sticker charts when I accomplish the routine and do rewards for when I finish a full week of the routine. I watch cartoons and snuggle with stuffies but I don’t feel fully safe at home.

Does anyone have any useful tips on helping be fully little and safe on my own? I would really appreciate it. :pinkh:

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#53178
Can you provide some more details about what you mean by "safety"?

The mention about being unable to be "alert" while "fully little" sounds extremely concerning from a psychological standpoint. Are you seeing a therapist about the ways you manage stress? Have you worked with them to help minimize the amount of anxiety you regularly experience? Please do make sure they are aware of how intense your stress levels are and that you experience bouts of extreme anxiety to the point of not being able to function.

Disassociating is not littlespace, and a little should absolutely be able to maintain safety awareness of surroundings even while deeply regressed. Littlespace is not a mental disorder, cognitive impairment, or illness. Regression does not transform you into being a different person, it is not disassociative identity disorder or multiple personality disorder, and is a part of a person's whole being--not a separate set of knowledge or experiences that is turned on and off like a light switch. Littles should have full awareness even during regression, and should be capable of making safety decisions in the case of something like, let's say, a house fire. A little may feel like a child but there is no magical transformation, even mentally, that erases the memories, knowledge, and experiences they've gathered into adulthood. Feeling is not the same as forgetting.

Please understand that using regression intentionally as a "coping mechanism" for anxiety (or any other mental health condition) is not something that is helpful to your stability and overall mental health. "Coping" is not "resolving", and is certainly not healthy growth in a positive direction. "Coping" can absolutely be detrimental to your long-term happiness. Sweeping real problems under the rug and saying you are "coping" is not realistically beneficial to you. Coping with cold weather by rubbing your hands together while standing in the middle of a winter storm of -5F may make your hands warm but will not stave off frostbite, you know? Coping can only go so far in giving you a small amount of temporary comfort, but it does not actually prevent or resolve the serious issue(s) that need to be acknowledged and taken seriously.
Having a certain personality type does not justify not seeking treatment for real-life issues. Regression is not a form of documented, proven, safe, or effective therapy, and we need to remember that just because something feels therapeutic does not mean it can take the place of actual therapy with a professional who can help you resolve or minimize negatively impactful issues like anxiety.
Just consider how a drug addict may say that heroin relaxes them and de-stresses them when they're feeling levels of high anxiety--does that mean they should continue to use the drug and avoid actual therapy?

If you lack situational awareness during regression then that's definitely something quite serious to investigate. You definitely want to talk with someone about that and try to get that sorted out. If you truly lose the capability to be logically aware of necessary safety measures then I do not believe we are going to be able to instruct you on how to resolve the real issue(s) you are facing. I can see how what you've described would feel frightening, and I'm sorry you experience that sort of condition.

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