[RosyRen20]

Hello!

So, I have some questions that I've been thinking about for a few days now.

The first is:
Does your caregiver have to be your SO? Could it be a close friend?

My second question is:

I still live at home with my uncle and my grandma. My uncle used to work in mental health as a social worker. I feel like he would know what age regression is or at least have an understanding of what it is. I'm unsure if I should tell him if I'm a Little or not.

Third and final question:

My girlfriend and I have been together for over 3 years and have sort of talked about moving in together in the future. She doesn't know I'm a Little and I feel like she doesn't know what it is. I don't know that for a fact but I also feel like she wouldn't be that surprised if I did finally decide to tell her. So, how/should I tell her? A friend of ours is a CG and she says I should just start the conversation but I don't know how.

Help???

[Motherly]

Does your caregiver have to be your SO? Could it be a close friend?

Why do you want a Caregiver involved in your regression? The root answer to this is so that you can feel a certain way. It’s so that you feel special. It’s so that you feel truly cared about, like someone feels you are especially important to them, and so that you feel...loved. The love you’re seeking doesn’t come from “just a friend”.

Asking someone to be your Caregiver is asking them to love you, to cherish you, to be devoted to you, to go out of their way for you, to think about you first, to want your happiness above others, to care about you more than average and in clear ways more than as friends, and to make you feel special. It’s a special bond, and something that feels magical because of so many feelings exchanged and acknowledged. There is very much a romance involved. Anyone telling you otherwise doesn’t understand or is flat-out lying, perhaps exaggerating to make their situation or fantasy sound better than reality. Unfortunately, the community heavily encourages roleplay and fantasy so it can be difficult to know when someone is being honest (including to themselves).

Friends with benefits does not work beyond short-term roleplay scenes when it comes to CGL because CGL is emotionally based when it comes to the partnership and care exchange. It is asking someone to love your atypical personality trait in a deep way. That’s just the real truth of it. You’re not going to have someone dedicate their existence to you and not feel a deeply special love for you.

My uncle used to work in mental health as a social worker. I feel like he would know what age regression is or at least have an understanding of what it is. I'm unsure if I should tell him if I'm a Little or not.

Being a little is not a mental illness and, thus, there is no medical diagnosis involved. There is no formal, trained educational material based on documented science. The average mental health professional isn’t going to know what “littlespace” is or what we mean by “regression”. It’s incorrect to assume it’s some sort of handicap or disorder. It’s completely unrelated to the pseudoscience “regression therapy”. You should not attempt to relate the Little personality trait to mental illness. If you want to come out to friends and family members then you should do so as an individual they already know and not as an alien or as an illness.

So, how/should I tell her?

There are plenty of ways to go about revealing yourself under the little label to a partner if that’s something you choose. I feel it’s probably important to allow the person to see what you feel are related to your regression on low levels prior to providing the label to them so that you can easily point out what you mean in your everyday life instead of it sounding too foreign. Making it seem mostly casual can be a helpful tactic.

It should never be assumed a partner will or should become your Caregiver though. Be aware that being a Caregiver is also a part of one’s personality and not just a fun role they play when partnered. Ultimately, this is okay because Littles do not actually need Caregivers. A Little can be content and lead a fulfilling life without having another person involved in their regressive traits.

Please feel free to read through our resources.

[RosyRen20]

Thank you so much for responding! That really cleared up a lot of misconceptions for me. I'm fairly new to the community so this explained a lot. Thank you!